Black and White

I added new black and white photos (my photos tab) that I took today. I find black and white photography more difficult than color. It was a grey and rainy day but I tried to find different angles and turn the ordinary into the extraordinary. The bird in the tree is my favorite. Hope you enjoy.
Have a great day!!

Weights/ Scales / Body Images

I would like to begin by saying that I think that all bodies and body types are unique and  are absolutely fabulous. But we have conditions that can cause unhealthy weights  which can lead to all kinds of disease and loss. If you are comfortable in your body and have no Health issues then more power to you! You go!

After my bipolar II diagnosis I was put on Array of medicines which all caused rapid weight gain for me. Under 4-5 weeks I gained about 45lbs. or 30kg.
I couldn’t where my clothes, I was/am so ashamed, I feel like the skum off the heart, (Again just speaking from how I felt and what my body needed) So these are my feelings that I put on no one else. This is just me. I can’t live my normal life at this weight and the weight off course damages my heart more which damages my lungs more.
So it’s on Donkey Kong!! I can do this
Scale is moving in right directions ands measurements are going down. I am trying to kick butt to get healthy!!

I am no longer taking those meds as they made me to sick, I am now testing others. It’s been a battle to say the least. I am working on the mental but I want my body back too.

I love to train strength and be active and it is hard, BUT I will not give up.

Small rules that might thelp (sounds simple but very effective)
1. Don’t be hard on yourself in the beginning because yes THIS IS THE BEGINNINIG. More to come as you grow.
2. Work -out as much as you can, even a round off of the couch is something. Then later as you get stonger you can get it on with the gym or outdoor training. But break day of strolls are allowed if not abused.
Watch over – snacking and mishaps. Always plan ahead.
Smoothies and snacks are good before/and after training, or breakfast or when you are on the run.I love smoothies

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Nothing worse that getting injured.
Don’t worry about the others around you, really they don’t care and you are not at there level, nor are you there to make friends.
Some people log there work out. I do this at home but some do it at gym to make sure nothing gets missed.
Last tip – If you really don’t want to go to gym and work get dressed and go, you will be surprised to see what happens=)

LAST THING – The kitchen makes the body, NOT THE GYM alone.

Keep it simple stupid. Don’t go out too hard in the begining and expect miracles but if you stick with it over time you will see results.

Personally I am all vegan for so many reasons and you can be to. There are many documenatries I will paste a few. Just give it a watch. Very interesting.
Email or discuss with me on blog /email if you need tips.

Just a reminder I have trained all of my life but I am no professional. Take what you need and leave the rest at the door.

We can do this, we dererve this!!

Thanks for Reading my blog. Have a fabulous Tuesday!!



I am exhausted from the day at the shopping center yesterday. Ok, no more shopping centers on Saturdays. I forgot my super powers are weak on Saturdays. No seriously, know your limits. Great day and way fun but way too many people and not enough water. I forget that I am healing and want to just jump in the game at 200%.
Soon enough!
Soon enough!

Have a great Sunday!

Bildresultat för exhausted


Recently and very quickly in one sweep I have found out that I have medical issues, both mental and physical (my heart).
I have wondered, why with all this information,  have I not worried more, cried more or just freaked out? I mean, I have worried and been scared but not like you would expect.

Last night I had a nightmare, a bad nightmare. I was scared out of my mind and running for my life. Guess fear and worry shows itself in all kinds of ways.

I will go on and I will be ok but I will admit that I am scared some days.

Now headed to Emporia in Malmö for some mind clearing fun =)

It’s ok to take a time out!!

After all the information and all the doctor’s appointments I needed to spoil myself with a little treat. Plus, I have not been feeling 100% for a few weeks so today I decided to skip the run out in the cold and have lunch with a friend. We ate at the new Mix and Go (Tivoligatan 8) here in Kristianstad with wraps, salads and fresh juices–DELICIOUS. I can highly recommend a visit.

It’s ok to rest but not to quit AND remember to take care of yourself and treat yourself even if it’s just a little something.

“Sometimes, little things make a big difference…”
Nino Varsimashvili

Example from menu. Enjoy!


Lung and allergy today

So I am done at the appointment and long story short, I don’t have the numbers you should see in a 38 year old. I have 80 and you should have 80-120 all of which has to do with oxygen circulation. This all explains why I have such a hard time breathing. Because of my age the doctor thinks this has more to do with my heart then my lungs. The good news is that this all has room for improvement! Woop! Woop!

So to be sure, CAT scan and allergy test have been ordered and my breathing problems are probably heart related.

All in all great news as far as lungs go and  there is hope. There is always hope!

Have a great day and remember to love yourself❤️❤️


Your body and mind is your temple.

As many of you know, I am home sick from work for many diseases. New meds, rest, adjust and lots of other reasons justify staying home. I for one have been told to “Exercise” which I usually love so no problem there.

But again today for some reason I had no desire what so ever. I know my heart needs this so I have to look deep within and bring out the superstar and I did. I hit it up but it doesn’t always have to be that way. Listen to your body, it knows best. A slow work-out is better than no work-out.
I started enelepril (meds for heart failure) today so we will see how that goes. Super excited for positive results and feeling better.

The afternoon I spent walking around town just gathering the fresh and cold air. Window shopping, so fun! I love little trinkets, the things they come up with.

I am totally for all diseases being just that, diseases and we should talk about them and not be ashamed but help each other, so this will be discussed on this blog at from time to time.

I believe that we should embrace and help not shun health issues.
For starters you are not alone. And if you feel alone know that I am right there with you.

  1. ( — About 2.4% of people around the world have had a diagnosis of bipolar disorder at some point in their lifetime, according to the first comprehensive international figures on the topic.
  2. Bipolar disorder is characterized by cycles of depression and mania, a euphoric, high-energy state that can result in heightened levels of creativity or output as well as erratic or risky behavior. People with bipolar disorder are at high risk suicide, other issues, and treatment includes psychiatric care and medication.

Now you know and knowing is half the battle.

I miss my job and hope that I soon get to go get started Little by Little again but my Health/doctor/ will decide that.
I love my job and the people there are the best. I am blessed and I am grateful to no end.

“Don’t you ever let a soul in the world tell you that you can’t be exactly who you are.”
― Lady Gaga

Lots of love. Have a great evening. And remember to love yourself.


Ok,  here is my favorite trinket from today.